"A wise man built his house upon the rock." - Matthew 7:24
A building is only as strong as its foundation.
Just as every building needs a foundation if it is going to stand, so too marriage needs a strong foundation to survive. It takes significant time and effort to lay the foundation, and without it the house will sink like sand in a rainstorm. A marriage is no different, and if there is no solid foundation, the family will crack and crumble just like a house of cards.
A healthy and successful marriage relies on commitment, love, trust, honesty, respect and dedication to each other. These are the quality traits that act as the foundation of marriage. In fact, these are the undisputable and constant truths that are also referred in the Bible. The indisputable truths in God's Word are not debatable, and when people neglect these truths, marriages and families ultimately fail.
God has designed marriage to be between one man and one woman, united as one flesh in an unbreakable covenant for life with Him.
Successful marriages are based on couples entering a covenant relationship on their wedding day where both individuals make a choice to live in covenant love until death do them part.
In its essence, love is not just words or feelings but love is a daily decision expressed in deeds. Love is a choice to be patient, kind and away from envy. Love does not demand and is not selfish, but always gives cheerfully. Love is forgiving and keeps no record of wrongs suffered. True love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. Covenant love never fails. (1 Cor.13:4-13)
Commitment and dedication to your marriage partner is given great importance by God. It is the kind of strength that should act as the foundation of relationships. When both husbands and wives in a marriage demonstrate this kind of love and commitment a very strong foundation is laid that will stand the tests of time.
Marriage has profound effects on the quality of life for couples and children, not only economically, but physically, emotionally and spiritually as well. The Bible says God hates divorce. He hates divorce because, as Jesus taught, marriage is a picture of the unity between God, as Father, Son and Holy Spirit. When people get divorced, they are tearing at the very fabric of the unity of God and they end up destroying their lives and ripping the hearts out of their children.
With divorce rates approaching over 50 percent, what hope do we have for our families? The impact of divorce on children is staggering, and the long term psychological and emotional scars children suffer from never fully recover. When parents violate all of God’s standards for marriage (or never marry to begin with), children are left feeling abandoned, confused, lonely, worthless, unloved, and completely broken.
The generations of children from broken homes grow up rebellious towards God, disrespectful towards others and disconnected from reality. The price we are paying now as a results from husbands/fathers and wives/mothers shunning their responsibilities are sons who grow to learn to use women and mistreat their future wives, and daughters who lack self-respect and dignity as they grow older and will not remain pure for their future husbands. Consequently, without proper instruction and guidance, the pattern of instability and curse of weak family foundations are passed down to future generations.
The family was the first institution ever created, rooted in Truth since the beginning, and faith and family are the backbone of society. Disconnecting human life, marriage, and family from its correct foundation in God is literally destroying our communities and keeping generations enslaved to self-destructive behavior.
The reality is that no matter how “liberated” a country has become; the needs of children have remained the same all throughout time! Children always need a mom and dad who are committed to God and each other to grow up to have happy, healthy and successful lives!
So how do we begin to restore our lives and offer hope for the future of our families? Most of us come from broken homes, mothers and fathers who failed at raising us, and we have no example to follow. With so much damage already done, we must abandon the world's definition of success and happiness and use the Word as a guide to victory by seeking the Lord for wisdom, Truth and understanding! We must take personal responsibility for our own lives and rise above our parents’ failures. It is absolutely critical that we break the generational curse that has been passed down to us and return to traditional family values. But in order to do that we must humble ourselves and lay our pride and desire to please ourselves first on His altar, even if we are still licking our wounds. It is only then that God can restore feeling and bring healing to our lives and relationships.
Once you rest things on that solid foundation, everything else will start to come together.
In the meantime, keep yourself in the love of God and use prayer as your means of bringing God's grace and peace onto the scene of your life.
*Related posts => Fatherless Failures & Feminist Failures
It is moving so fast, I don't believe we will recover until Jesus Returns. You can see why it is called the Quickening,ReplyDelete
Or, a succesful marriage could be built on a solid internet high-speed connection and a mutual love of sandwiches.ReplyDelete
"The generations of children from broken homes grow up rebellious towards God"ReplyDelete
And yet i was raised by two parents who stayed together 'till death did them part' and were quite religious (good irish and italian catholics) and i still turned out to be a heathen.
Oh, and my paretns were both straight, yet i turned out to buck that rend too.
0 for 2
Good post, Dani.ReplyDelete
That used to be a loaded word with me. Yeah, I grew up with a step-mom and a father who both love me. Doesn't mean that I wanted to be in a family. I love my father, I owe him so much, but back then, I just wanted to do what I wanted to.
Never really got the importance of family when I was younger. Now, the concept of family is getting more important and I'm feeling as if I may want to find a man that can put up with me and of be of a like mind when it comes to a potential family. I used to not want children because I was afraid I'd turn out like my real mother. I would never do what she did. Never.
(It's better to not be a mother than to be a bad one.)
If people are going to be parents, kids always need to feel safe and loved and brought up with a moral compass.
the quickening? What are you into Art Bell or something...chuckleReplyDelete
"And yet i was raised by two parents who stayed together 'till death did them part' and were quite religious (good irish and italian catholics) and i still turned out to be a heathen."
Yeah Catholocism has a way of doing that...
"Oh, and my paretns were both straight, yet i turned out to buck that rend too."
You seem to think this is all a big joke, laughing about God and His moral standard. It wont be too funny when you stand before an angry God knowing you mocked Him your whole life.
Thanks Randi, that means a lot. You are the one who inspired me to write this post.ReplyDelete
One thing I learned from my upbringing by my parents is what NOT to do. I have no doubt that you would ever end up like your mother, but you would love and care for your children (adopted or blood) like a good mother is supposed to do. You know first hand what pain and abandonment feels like, so you would probably be one of the best mothers around. I agree that it's better to not be a mother than to be a bad one.
I'm sure you will find a man who will love and cherish you, and who will be a good husband and father to your children. You never know what the Lord may have in store for you, seek to honor Him and He will direct your paths. (BTW - I know of a great single guy at my church. *Wink-wink - I've been known to be a good matchmaker.)
In all seriousness, I am so thrilled that you have found God and I pray that your spiritual journey will continue to bring you closer to the Lord.
Bob - Thanks for saving me the trouble of responding to AG's mockery. Apparently his parents did something severely wrong with raising him. What a shame!
You (or whoever you copied and pasted from?) could have made your argument just as well without bringing the God and anti-gay stuff into it. OK, yes, marriage is good, family is good, morals are good. What the hell does that have to do with God, and why can't the same things occur in a gay relationship?ReplyDelete
And yes, it would be funny standing before a childish angry god who gets all flustered because the creatures he created failed to follow his arbitrary rules. It'd be like watching a chef leave his cookies in the oven too long, then start yelling at the chocolate chips for burning too easily. Hilarious!
Phronk - Where did you get "anti-gay" from? I was simply stating the value of traditional families and the importance of a marriage relationship.ReplyDelete
But since you brought it up - Tell me, is there something unique that a mother and a father can offer a child that two mommies or two daddies can never accomplish? Be honest. In which environment are children likely to be better off?
You agree that marriage is good, family is good, and morals are good. And - What the hell does that have to do with God, you ask?
Well, God is the Creator of marriage, family and morals and He is the Rock of our foundation.
"And yes, it would be funny standing before a childish angry god who gets all flustered because the creatures he created failed to follow his arbitrary rules."ReplyDelete
Childish? Is it childish to valiantly vindicate that which is of infiite worth against those who have mocked it?
You won't be saying that too much longer Phronk...you will weep over how you mocked that which is the most precious and treasurable in all of existance, either in this life or in hell.
If we cheer over a man who defends the honor of his wife when a scum bag grabs her butt in public and says some vile suggestion what shall we do when God who is infinitely honorable defends His infinite honor and worth against scumbags who made a joke of Him and treated Him as inconsequential?
That is the weighty issue, but since you asked:
" OK, yes, marriage is good, family is good, morals are good. What the hell does that have to do with God, and why can't the same things occur in a gay relationship?"
It has everything to do with God, marriage was His idea. It is supposed to be a picture of our unity with Him. Marriage and morals are just pragmatic unctions without God, that's why we are even talking about this in our culture, we have rejected God as law giver.
So marriage is good, family is good, morals are good...Why can't the same things occur in a gay relationship?ReplyDelete
HMMM? Well, because two homos don't make up a marriage, they can't have children and they certainly lack any decent morals that would qualify them to raise a good family.
It's like saying, chocolate chip cookies are good and tasty, but why can't you enjoy the same delicious flavor without the sugar, flour or chocolate chips? Hilarious!
"With so much damage already done, we must abandon the world's definition of success and happiness and use the Word as a guide to victory by seeking the Lord for wisdom, Truth and understanding!"ReplyDelete
Dani, just as you've mentioned in the above quote, we just have to get back to the Word of God. It is time that we stopped seeking the world's advice on issues that the world should be coming to us for advice. It is all there in God's word and we should never take it for granted. It is a gift we should never let go.
Absolutely wonderful post.
bob: "You seem to think this is all a big joke, laughing about God"ReplyDelete
Yes, bob, that's exactly what i think, just as dani thinks it's all a big joke to laugh at and hate people for their sexuality.
I find her behaviour to be the more hurtful of the two, as it affects real people, not some imaginary being who obviously has a very fragile ego.
dani: "Apparently his parents did something severely wrong with raising him."ReplyDelete
Well, now that you mention it, my mum was emotionally and physically abusive.
But it's ok, becuse she used her religion to justify it.
Thanks for that good old loving xian attitude of laughing at the suffering of others.
AG - It's much better to be honest when telling a story because the truth is already transparent. Presenting only half the truth by saying you were raised by two parents who stayed together 'till death did them part' and were quite religious, yet you still turned out to be a heathen - raises doubt in one's mind about your upbringing.ReplyDelete
The fact that your mom was emotionally and physically abusive (and your father probably didn't do anything to stop her) would explain why you are the way you are, and why you have such a distain for women and a deep seeded hatred for God. This only further goes to prove my point that dysfunctional families produce dysfunctional and broken children. Sorry you had to experience that, but you should start taking responsibility for your own life, quit playing the victim and shaking your fist at God if you ever want to be healed from the hurt in your past.
Where did I get anti-gay stuff? Are you serious?
How about: God has designed marriage to be between one man and one woman...
or: [gay people] certainly lack any decent morals that would qualify them to raise a good family.
is there something unique that a mother and a father can offer a child that two mommies or two daddies can never accomplish? Be honest. In which environment are children likely to be better off?
Yes, sure, there's something unique about man-woman relationships. There's also something unique about man-man and woman-woman. Which pairing makes the best set of parents? I don't know. That's an empirical question. My guess is that most things would be about equal between a gay and straight pair of parents (or possibly with an advantage to gays, since their decision to become parents needs to be carefully thought out and justified, whereas any straight pair of people can forget their pill and pop out a kid they didn't really want and/or only had in order to serve some religious army).
Bob: Wow. You got scary and irrational. Yeah, I guess we'll see who ends up weeping. Maybe we'll both end up in some Norse hell, weeping as Odin punishes us for not believing in him.
I bet you doubt that though. Which is why you should understand why I doubt just as much that I'll end up answering to your version of God.
The sad thing is that people who waste their time and energy worshiping some fictional afterlife creature can't possibly discover if that creature is real until it's too late (i.e., they're dead). Funny how supernatural belief systems protect themselves in that way.
I hope it is Odin, because otherwise I've wasted a ton of time building this replica Valhalla in my backyard.ReplyDelete
"You got scary and irrational."ReplyDelete
Scary, perhaps. Irrational, that remains to be pointed out.
We just often act like God is going to have a hard time making a case against sinners before damning them...as if God will be groping for evidence that demands condemnation. I think each one of your comments is enough indictment.