In the past several decades, the United States has become the world’s leader in having fatherless families. When did this epidemic begin, and what is the impact on our children?
Not surprisingly, the rise of father-absence can be traced 50 years back, right on the brink of the Baby Boomers. In 1965, Daniel Patrick Moynihan, looked into the problems of under-class America. The Moynihan Report issued this solemn warning:
"From the wild Irish slums of the 19th century eastern seaboard, to the riot-torn suburbs of Los Angeles, there is one unmistakable lesson in American history: A community that allows a large number of young men to grow up in broken families, dominated by women, never acquiring any stable relationship to male authority, never acquiring any rational expectations about the future that community asks for and gets chaos."
Of course, the feminists reviled the report as promoting the "hetero-patriarchal" agenda, taking personal offense rather than seeing the reality of the situation.
It is no surprise to find out that children who grow up without a father have significantly more problems compared to children who grow up in a stable home with a mom and dad.
With rising numbers of divorce rates and of out-of-wedlock births in the United States, over half of all children are growing up without the bio-logical father in the home.
Children who grow up without fathers are more likely to: Have Psychological Problems, Commit Suicide, Abuse Alcohol & Other Drugs, Become Sexually Active at an Early Age, Be Involved in Crime, Go to Prison, Five Times More Likely to Live in Poverty, Twice as Likely to Drop Out of School, and More Likely to Be Uninvolved With Their Own Children When They Become Fathers!
In addition to growing up without a father in the home, chances are pretty good that children will also grow up without their mother in the home. When fathers are absent from their role as a provider, it forces the mothers to abandon their role and be away from home in-order to provide for the family. Since she has to work, someone must replace her position as caregiver, systematically forcing her children down the chain into the hands of a daycare provider. Along with the disadvantage of not having a father figure, children also lose the security of being home with mom, consequently warping the child’s self-worth even further.
Of course there are those poor unfortunately souls who have unmarried mothers that intentionally have children anyway, thereby placing them into daycare institutions. Either way, the child is left feeing abandoned, lonely and confused.
But fathers are more than just income producers. Fathers provide the very order and structure of the family and society. They demonstrate leadership and authority, discipline and direction. Fathers offer protection and guidance to their children, but most importantly, a father’s role is to portray a picture of who God the Father is! If children grow up with a distorted view of their earthly father, they will certainly grow up with a distorted view of their Heavenly Father.
“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” - Ephesians 6:4
- 2002 Study => Experiments in Living: The Fatherless Family
*cheering! cheering!* I agree with 100%. I worked in a daycare, and I would have to say at least 75 percent of our kids lived with a single mom. The few that lived with mom and dad were much more well-adjusted, none of them were on any medications for things that don't actually require it, and they were usually pleasant and helpful. This is a serious problem that our country is facing.ReplyDelete
There is also the problem of father's who do not raise their children properly, like when they instill values that are not neccessarily good.ReplyDelete
Gen-X wrote about the negatives resulting from people that place their kids into daycare institutionsReplyDelete
Here's some more information about the disadvantages of daycare...
Maybe a perspective from the child of a single mother would do some good.ReplyDelete
My father left my mother when I was 2. She immediately moved back in with my maternal Grandmother, my Great-Uncle (Papa) and Aunt also living there.
I was a good student in school, excelling in reading, writing, and social studies. I have always struggled with math and science has never came easy, but I have only failed two classes my entire academic career.
I attended public school and graduated fourth in my class with a 3.0+ GPA (the exact number escapes me). I attended a private college to stay close to home.
I was a well-respected student in college, liked by professors and classmates alike. I received an Honors Scholarship, an additional scholarship awarded for my writing abilities, and in my senior year the Outstanding Literature Student of the Year award.
For 3 of the 4 years of my college career I worked part-time. I became such a liked and valued employee I was given a full-time position upon graduation.
I will be starting an MLS program in the fall.
My little brother has never seen his father. He is only nine, but is already showing signs of being a bright and successful young man. His grades are excellent, his behavior (for a hyperactive nine-year old) admirable, and his general outlook on life positive and inspiring.
A loving and supportive family is important, yes, but the biological father does not have to be part of that family. Ideally, preferably, he should be. Divorce and withdrawal from any parental figure has the potential to wreak havoc on a child's emotional well-being. But if his support system is strong enough, if there is family enough to make up for the loss, then the absent father (or mother, for that matter) is an unfortunate incident and nothing more.
I never felt lacking, I never mistreated or neglected, I never abused drugs, committed murder or theft, attempted suicide, ran away from home, or the like.
And I am the son of a single mother.
Not every apple on the tree tastes the same.
I find it a little unfortunate that the only published article you made reference to was over 40 years old. I also noticed that there was no mention of studies looking at motherless homes. Your source is out of date and insufficient to really provide the kind of support you need to make claims of these kinds. I think Brandon's comment makes it clear that neither you nor Daniel Patrick Moynihan has enough information on what is actually going on in all fatherless families across North America.ReplyDelete
America does not have an epidemic of motherless children.
Here is a study done in 2002 that I'm sure you will find interesting:
Experiments in Living: The Fatherless Family
I just wanted to say thanks for your comments on my blog and for sharing your story.
For some reason I did not receive an e-mail alert when you sent it several days ago, but I came across it today when I received an alert from another commenter. I wrote many articles last year so I don't check them regularly to see if there are any new comments and I rely on blogger to alert me.
I'm glad I came across it and I do appreciate you sharing your story though. I grew up with a single mom too, but I ended up a statistic by the time I graduated, like so many fatherless kids do. You were definitely blessed to have a supportive family.
Let me ask you this: Would you say that you were more of the exception to the rule? Or do you know a lot of fatherless people like you who never have any trouble and are doing just fine? I think we can agree that, generally speaking, it is best for children to have both a mother and a father in the home.
Looking forward to chatting further with you.
BTW Seanny - A quick Google search will lead you to thousands of links to => Fatherless Statistics
I hesitate to call myself either the exception or the rule. Yes, I know of many children of single parents that succeed in life. I know of an equal amount that don't. I suppose it just depends on the child's individual case, and not just the circumstances at home but in school and in the community as well.ReplyDelete
I agree with you partly; ideally yes, the parents stay happily married and raise the child together. But there are some couples who are divorced and still raise their children together. It makes it more difficult and takes a whole new approach, but the child does not feel lacking in the least. I for one believe that if the parents are going to be engaged in constant conflict but can peaceably come together if not living under the same roof, then let them divorce and still share the responsibilities of the child. Of course, there is something to be said about preparing oneself before taking on the task of spouse and parent.
I want you to know I fully respect your dedication to being a good wife and mother even if I don't always agree with you on certain issues.
I think you touched on a major point referring to a child's individual case, not just the circumstances at home but in school and in the community as well. I am a firm believer that the two most destructive forces plaguing our society and contributing to the moral decay in our country are Divorce & Public Education!
The government school system has given us the largest Bureaucratic Daycare and brainwashing system in the world. Even children from the best "Christian" home who attend a godless public school can be completely corrupted and demoralized if they are away from their parents for 8 hours a day at a pagan seminary.
Unfortunately for me, my dad abandoned our family when I was seven years old, which forced my mother into an undesirable position as a single mom. She had to work three jobs away from home in order to support us. Since my mother was made to perform in the role of a provider, we were robbed of her God-given role as a caregiver. So essentially, I grew up without a mother or a father (only my father was permanently absent from the picture).
My mom took us to church every week, we went to youth group, she read bible stories to us, and we prayed regularly. But my upbringing was a far cry from a “Christian” home. Even if my mom wanted to, she couldn’t afford to send my brother and I to a private Christian school, and she couldn’t homeschool us since she had to work three jobs. So what other option was there? Public school of course!
With so much anger and pain from my parents divorce, I was destined for destruction anyway, no matter how I was educated! The public school was just a breeding ground for delinquents, and I fit right in. While I was there, I picked up a few drugs habits, several sex partners along with a couple STD's and I also had a baby at fifteen.
Despite my mother’s efforts in taking us to church, the 1-2 hours a week were no match for the endless hours at public school.
Public schools teach gang-rule, severe competition, ultimate peer pressure, chemical dependency, sick vocabulary, and the government’s main objective is to completely usurp parental authority. So what does the school have left to offer?
Well ~ Violence and school shootings are becoming commonplace in schools today. The homosexual agenda is promoted and sexual harassment is rampant in the hallways and allowed in classrooms. Rape, molestation and other sexual crime are ordinary events at schools and crimes committed by teachers are rising daily.
So I guess my point is, fatherless children attending public school have the worst chance of success. Of course there are exceptions, but I am not willing to risk it with my children.
If people are going to have children, they should be prepared to provide the best possible living environment and education for them.
Looking forward to your response. Talk to you soon!
Dani wrote... "With so much anger and pain from my parents divorce, I was destined for destruction anyway, no matter how I was educated!"ReplyDelete
There's the source of your problems, Dani!
Your problems are not - AND NEVER HAVE BEEN - the Public Schools. Your problems are YOUR problems!
While other kids were actually there being educated, you were at school linking up for promiscuity. No wonder you failed to be educated!
Unfortunately, your lack of education is part of what has you continuing to place all the blame in the wrong place.
Thank you for that confession!
Dont think the christian world is perfect. My husband kicked me and our kids out when I my youngest at the time had just turned 1. we were pentecostal/charismatics attending a Baptist church at the time, and I received not much support. Infact, none of the church members spoke to me after that as I stopped attending there. He continued attending and was supported in getting a divorce. I tried to reconcile years later when he seemed keen on the idea, but the Pastor of that church, the most evil man I have ever met in my life, destroyed all my chances of that by telling my ex-husband a complete lie, which he believed, because "he's a man of God". I stay out of church now..dont need my current family shattered. And it has been christians who put me down for having more children in the last few years. Yet friends who have had abortions have not had such nasty treatment and name-calling by the christian community. hence I keep my distance. I see them supporting women who have had abortions, but not supporting the poor murdered babies. I have added you blog to my homeschooling blog by the way.ReplyDelete